HAVE YOU EVER FELT SO GUARDED, SO CAREFUL, THAT YOU WERE AFRAID TO REALLY LIVE?
Comparing myself, building walls and making excuses why I couldn't do anything, I lived like that for a very long time. Denial just seemed easier except, I knew there was more. I always felt restless and irritable. You could even say angry and deep down afraid to live.
So many of us spend our days looking around, comparing ourselves, wondering if we’re doing it right. We think that everyone else seems to have been given “The Life Handbook” that tells them what to do next and how to do it.
And no matter how hard we try – with all of the accolades and achievements, we still never feel satisfied. We’re angry and ready to fight or hide from our own reality.
For me, it began as early as five years old. Sitting in my kindergarten class finger-painting, I remember looking around the room wondering if I was doing it right. I couldn’t shake that feeling that I was just not enough.
Maybe it’s because I was called a scaredy cat, afraid of her own shadow. Or because I was made wrong for my crazy vivid imagination. But, I soon learned to armor up and guard myself against letting anyone see how I really felt inside.
If there was a problem, you were to blame. If my needs weren’t met, it’s because you didn’t try hard enough. I buried my personal shame and fears and didn’t want to look at them.
WHEN WE FINALLY SURRENDER, OUR LIFE APPEARS.
For many years, I expected life to be a struggle - and it was. A failed marriage, the loss of my beloved dog, my father passing, an ovarian tumor and leaving a job that was my identity for twenty years – I got what I thought I deserved. Sitting alone in my living room, I asked God for help. Help to find my purpose and learn to live in ease. And it was in that moment of surrender that I found it.
I finally decided it was time to tell the truth. Nothing I wanted for myself could exist if I didn’t own what was there and believe in another way. I had a chip on my shoulder and I was making myself sick. So, I discovered the power of getting quiet within. Instead of being guarded, I could breathe, feel protected and stop fighting so hard. Anger was my mask and it wasn’t my true nature. It’s not yours either.
I know what it’s like to feel angry, blame others, yourself sick because you’re trying to hold it all together. You want to run or maybe fight, but the thing you’re looking for is relief in the present.
One of my true gifts in life is that I get to work with people and show them another option.
Rather than plugging into your most basic nature, I help you connect with that part of yourself that is wired for peace, calm and clarity. By igniting your parasympathetic nerve system in ways it’s never been used, I help you break out of those ancient patterns and finally find that healthy peace you’ve been looking for.
I’ve been told that what I do is hard to explain unless you experience it. And it is. So, I want to invite you to connect and see how I can help you. Officially, I'm a meditation instructor, integrative life coach and prepare for healing coach - but what I do is largely based on a combination of all the tools I've pulled together to help you find peace.